cars and phones and diamond ringsToday at work I was updating our website. It's more of a process I go through, rather than actual coding, which means it doesn't take too much thinking on my part; I've done this same process for the last 2 years. I digress. While working on the monthly website update I'm listing to my Jack Johnson CD. The song "Gone" came on...
Those are only removable things
And what about your mind
Does it shine or
Are there things that concern you more
Than your time
Gone give a damn
Gone be the birds when they don’t want to sing
All awkward with their things
I'm not a music person; I rarely listen to the words. I dated a musician when I was 18 and when he found this out (I don't listen to the words) I think I saw his heart break in front of me, he never looked at me the same. I felt guilty about this, but I now accept that this is just a part of who I am.
For some reason, today, I heard the lyrics for the song "Gone". The song's words seem to have spoken to me about my current struggle with giving up my stuff.
For me, I'll admit, I get caught up in materialism. I feel like I'm always competing to have a better car, I want nice jewelry(although I have none), name brand trendy clothes, purses, shoes, nice electronics like a plasma tv, an apple computer, gps, iPod, bigger apartment or a house. I feel conflicted, because if I really wanted these things I could go out and buy them, but I don't. It's not me (ok, I did buy the gps because I'm directionally challenged. I believe it saves me money on gas; that's my justification anyway).
Maybe I have a hard time giving up my stuff because I feel like if I don't own stuff, than I'm "poor". I'll feel like I won't fit in with society or the norm because I won't have anything to show my worth. The 80% of me (that I talked about in my last post) tells me giving up all my stuff will be a freeing & cleansing experience.
I can never put a price tag on my Sweden experience, but my iPod will be worthless in the next two years.
So, what do I want? Who am I? Do I want belongings or do I want an experience?
I'm coming to terms...
Gone with my belongings. They're all removable things, this new experience will not be removable it will always stay with me...but it sure will feel like some bling bling to me.